As the long-standing effects of bullying are becoming better understood, schools are searching for resources to help them address the problem.

 Educators say bullying and all forms of violence are interrelated. They also agree any approach should begin in the youngest grades and continue through high school. And parents must be involved.

 Schools in central Maine are trying different ways to tackle the problem. There are anti-bullying workshops and schoolwide prevention campaigns, "no-tolerance" policies and information available in books, educational resources, the Internet and the state Department of Education's Project Against Bullying.

 In Franklin County, Kuhlman is establishing Peace In Our Families: A School-Based Violence Prevention Project.

 Through her efforts, the University of Colorado's nationally recognized Center for the Study and Prevention of Violence has selected the Cape Cod Hill School in New Sharon as one of five pilot sites to implement a bullying prevention program next fall.

 Based on 10 years of research conducted in Norway, the Colorado project has resulted in:

 "This will add a structure to whatever programs already exist and a system of intervening," Kuhlman said. "Our vision is that we would learn how to do it ourselves, and then replicate it in other schools in the county."

 The program includes training and technical support from the Colorado center, a questionnaire for fourth- and fifth-graders to gauge the problem, an anti-bullying conference and guidelines for a committee of staff, parents and students.

 A part-time coordinator would oversee a system of supervising students during break periods, and there would be individual intervention with bullies, children being bullied and families.

 The program is estimated to cost $20,000, and fund raising is ongoing, Kuhlman said.

 HELP FROM OUTSIDE

 If the culture of bullies and victims is not attacked in the lower grades, it can turn into sexual harassment and prejudice when children grow up, according to community educator Megan Devine.

 Devine, of Rape Crisis Assistance in Waterville, puts on free, 80-minute presentations at schools in Kennebec and Somerset counties. The 29-year-old educator focuses on bullying and teasing in elementary schools, sexual harassment and its close cousin — flirting — in middle schools, and sexual assault in high schools.

 She uses role playing, group activities and games to bring home the point that "it's uncool to hurt other people."

 "I try and model clear communication and tell them what they can do to stand up for themselves," Devine said.

 "And I tell them that the one receiving the behavior is the only one who can decide if their feelings have been hurt."

 With the youngest children, she explains the power of assertiveness and nonviolent response.

 "Bullies are looking for (victims) to be hurt and get upset, to see their eyes well up with tears," Devine said.

 "I tell them how to deal with it —agree with them, laugh at them, look them in the eye and give them strong faces and dirty looks, and tell them to stop. If that doesn't work, I tell them they need to get help from an adult."

 In discussions with older children, Devine gets kids to talk about what motivates bullies, and how it feels to be picked on. Children often describe harassers as kids from troubled homes or who are picked on outside of school, believing they will feel better if they make someone else feel worse.

 Or a bully may appear to be well-liked, but the friends, in reality, might fear him.

 "Starting with young kids is critical," Devine said. "If no one does anything, we're dooming them."

 CIVIL RIGHTS TEAMS

 The Civil Rights Team Project, a program offered through the Maine Attorney General's Office, works within elementary, middle and high schools to address intolerance and the potential for hate violence.

 At the core of harassment is language, according to experts. A verbal assault can be as devastating as a physical attack, said Assistant Attorney General Thomas Harnett, who heads up the project.

 "For many kids, their school day is not spent thinking about education, but how are they going to get through the day," Harnett said.

 "We found that incidents of serious harassment and physical violence were preceded by weeks and sometimes months of bullying and taunting that was going on below the radar screen of teachers."

 At participating schools, students being bullied or their friends can talk to classmates who have had training in the civil rights program. The information is then relayed to an adult.

 "It's not peer mediation or conflict resolution," Harnett said. "It's a vehicle to get information to those who can do something about it."

 The program is so successful it has grown from 18 schools in 1996 to 122 this year, including four elementary schools. And there is a lengthy waiting list.

 Teams comprising students and faculty advisors work with a trainer and the attorney general's staff on recognizing and changing intolerance and reducing bias-motivated harassment.

 School staff also attend an workshop on the Maine Civil Rights Act and on recognizing and addressing hateful behavior.

 Central Maine towns with civil rights teams in their schools include: Augusta, Farmington, Skowhegan, Madison, Pittsfield, Waterville and Winthrop.

 SCHOOLS REACT

 New Sharon's Cape Cod Hill School, which goes from kindergarten through sixth grade, is tackling the problem of bullying any way it can, says Principal Nora Thombs. About 4 percent of students are discipline problems but dealing with the problems they generate occupies a majority of her time.

 Among the creative programs here: every staff member is assigned to mentor a half-dozen students. The small groups meet regularly and kids are free to talk about issues affecting them.

 "We're trying every way we can to have a positive adult contact with every child," Thombs said. "The children all like it, knowing that someone in the building is looking out for them. squabbles.

 SCHOOL STRATEGIES

 At the Albert S Hall Elementary School in Waterville, educators are united in the desire to create a safe, social climate that is free of offensive language, hostility, and intimidation, according to Principal Susan DeBlois.

 "All violence in school starts with one thing — language. It's not physical violence; its the put-downs and teasing," she said. "Language is the weapon."

 DeBlois emphasized to children the importance of learning to say "stop," asking for help, and stepping in when they see trouble brewing with their peers.

 "If they don't stand up for themselves in a nonviolent way and get an adult to stop the behavior, we tell them that they become part of the problem.

 At Atwood-Tapley School in Oakland, guidance counselor Meredith Carr said a variety of bullying prevention techniques are in use, including holding class meetings, and enlisting sixth-graders as mentors to younger children while on the playground.

 The biggest obstacle she encounters is lack of resources.

 "With one counselor for 650 students, it's hard to get to the kids who need extra help," she said.

 Counselor Wendy Flaschner, of Readfield, works at Leeds Central School where she also talks to classes about harassment — the language of hate — and feeling unsafe in school.

 "We don't have a lot of violence," she said, "but there are a lot of scared kids."

 She said bullies see themselves as doing nothing wrong and have little empathy or perception of how their targets feel.

 Children can be taught compassion and to be assertive, show respect and exert self-control, she said.

 "These are social interaction skills that kids coming to school don't always have," Flaschner said. "They are as important as math and reading.

 "This behavior starts in the home. A five-year old coming to school as a bully is showing learned behavior from the adult models in his life."

 Educators agree that children are painfully vulnerable to hurtful language, and early experiences can leave long lasting emotional scars. Their profound desire to make the fear go away was recalled by DeBlois, of Waterville.

 When she sits with young children who have been hurt, she said she asks what they would like to see happen next.

 "What they tell me is that they don't want to see the other kid punished," DeBlois said. "All they only want is for it to stop."

 
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