No. I don’t know what that title means or if it defines the two brain-dead, small-time corner boys played by Matt Damon and Casey Affleck in Doug Liman’s (The Bourne sequels) new comedy thriller “The Instigators” on Apple TV+.

Matt Damon, left, and Casey Affleck in “The Instigators” 2024.

Would you believe me if I told you that the movie begins in a shrink’s office with Vietnamese psychologist (A charming Hong Chau, the only straight character in this story. You’ll love her) but with Matt Damon as her patient.

Don’t waste time worried about it. Just pay attention to what’s going on in a few classic heist comedies and with scenes between Michael Stuhlbarg and Alfred Molina acting like Vladimir and Estragon in “Waiting For Godot.”

In “Instigators” there is no one smart guy holding up the dumb one. Both here are dropouts from the sixth grade who have lived their entire lives on the street and on the run.

Both are small-time neighborhood crooks reading from the book “How To Steal From The Church Poor Box” and sharing the nickels.

Make no mistake here, Rory (Damon) is the smartest, but just two spaces up on the space meter from Cobby (Affleck) because all he wants from the next mistake is to get over $38,000 to pay his ex wife for years of back alimony.

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Both of these two corner boys are trying to convince a local hoodlum crime boss, Mr. Besegai (a totally different Michael Stuhlbarg) and his stuttering bake shop partner Richie Dechico (a wonderful Alfred Molina) to let them pull off a robbery at City Hall, where millions of dollars in cash are kept, but more importantly a mysterious ID bracelet that has dates that will lead them to blackmail the crooked Mayor of Boston (Ron Perlman). Say what?

The car chases are standards, and the rest of the cast seems to be borrowed from good actors like Toby Jones, Ving Rhames, and Ron Perlman who had nothing on their cards at the moment and were guaranteed good hotels in Beantown. Hong Chau was so good in 2022 “The Whale” and 2027 “Downsizing” with Matt Damon.

Now streaming on Apple TV+.

J.P. Devine of Waterville is a former stage and screen actor.

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