This April, we commemorate the 25th Sexual Assault Awareness Month Campaign.  In recent years, we collectively bore witness to testimony from Chanel Miller, Tarana Burke, Christine Blasey Ford, Gisèle Pelicot and millions of individual #MeToos. 

Public disclosures invite us to deepen our empathy, capacity for care and commitment to prevention. Unfortunately, too many are refusing this opportunity to listen and change. My heart sank as I read Maria Cruz’s recent op-ed (“Janet Mills’ TV campaign was unfair to Graham Platner,” April 13). Data is clear: we are most at risk with people we know. 

Cis men are the most likely perpetrators of gender-based violence. All of us, including men, may be targets, but women and LGBTQ people are disproportionately at risk. Most of us know someone who is a survivor of sexual violence, although we may not know who. We likely know someone who has caused harm to another; they may not know how to take responsibility or offer repair. The way is not to deny, accuse or claim our own victim status (DARVO), although these are common defensive reflexes.

Supporters of Graham Platner’s campaign do not need to downplay the significance of military sexual trauma but instead can offer pathways that model genuine apology and repair. Taking responsibility for his past remarks involves preventing new ones from amplifying victim-blaming or taking the same tone. And, let us all remind everyone in our life that we all deserve to be safe from sexual violence. Anyone needing additional information or support can call the Statewide line 1-800-871-7741 or visit mecasa.org.

Kimberly Simmons, Ph.D.
Portland