My workplace includes two single-user bathrooms, side by side, which are not officially assigned by gender. Yet men typically use the one on the left, while women use the other one.

It’s no mystery why women prefer not to use restrooms that men do. Men leave the seat up, and who wants to have to put the seat down in a public lavatory?

Anyway, one time I did have to use the “men’s room,” and I noticed that someone had left a Rolling Stone magazine in there. Ha, I thought. Most women would not be caught dead carrying a magazine into the bathroom.

I was further amused when, a few days later, I went into the “women’s room” and found a school-supply catalog. I was pretty sure this had simply been left behind by someone who had stopped en route after getting her mail. I assumed as much because last year I had put out an e-mail to see if anybody saw a catalog I had misplaced and was embarrassed to learn that, yes, I had left it in the bathroom.

Men read Rolling Stone in the john. Women carry around school-supply catalogs. What can I say?

Some things never change. Others go through cataclysmic evolutions.

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Of course, I’ve been thinking about bathrooms lately because of the recently passed North Carolina law requiring people to use the bathroom that corresponds to their birth gender. This was followed by President Barack Obama’s letter telling public schools they must let students use the bathroom of their choice, depending on their gender identity, or risk losing federal funding.

My question about the North Carolina law is this: Who’s going to enforce it? Will there be armed guards posted at all public restrooms requiring every person to show a birth certificate?

I can tell you right now that is not going to fly. Women have it hard enough as it is when it comes to public bathroom facilities. There are never enough of them. We always have to wait in line.

Last summer, I was sitting in Boston’s North Station when a pigeon pooped on me. I ran to the ladies room, where I knew there would be a line. But I was desperate. I scooted past people, murmuring, “I just need to use a sink.” Nobody paid me any mind, which was a relief. I had expected to be bopped over the head with a purse.

When women need a bathroom, trust me, it’s a serious issue. And if we have a child in tow, a child not quite toilet-trained, a child ready to, um, explode, I don’t think there’s a bathroom guard in the world who will stop us. I am well aware that men have their needs, too. But they cannot compare with a woman’s. Plus, men have more options.

It seems to me that communities need to provide public restrooms. Stores and restaurants, too. It’s a matter of common decency, when it isn’t required by law. Our bodily functions are a fact of life. We need to deal with them without being harassed. I wouldn’t want to be in the position of telling somebody they had to go elsewhere.

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People who want to regulate the use of public bathrooms are afraid that perverts will invade ladies’ rooms and attack women. I suppose this could happen, but the image of a predator in drag is more ludicrous than frightening to me. After all, some public restrooms always have been risky business. I think of the time I considered stopping at a lonely rest area with two single outhouses, then thought better of it.

The people we are talking about who need to use a bathroom of their choice, the restroom they feel more comfortable with, are a tiny fraction of our population. The New York Times estimates that no more than 0.3 percent of Americans are transgender. Why is it so difficult to accommodate them?

Women’s rooms have stalls, so no one is on display anyway. Maybe the gents should be stalls-only as well.

The gender-free, single-user bathroom is the perfect solution, but impractical. There would never be enough of them, in any situation.

I understand why some of us are uncomfortable with this issue. There have been times when I have been waited on by an androgynous person and I wondered, “he or she?” But I’ve always concluded that it doesn’t really matter. I certainly would never ask.

So here we are, back where we started. Who’s going to tell people they can’t use the bathroom?

Liz Soares welcomes e-mail at lsoares@gwi.net.


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