On the evening of Sept. 14, I attended Cosmic Kotzschmar with my husband and daughter. This concert highlighted planetary music played by James Kennerley on the Kotzschmar Organ, housed in Merrill Auditorium. It was a powerful performance, and I applaud Mr. Kennerly on his expertise of such an involved instrument, as well as the Friends of the Kotzschmar Organ for providing such an accessible experience – including pay-what-you-can pricing, free entry for children and open seating.

I also want to use this opportunity to thank the amazing support my family receives from Waterboro Elementary School, the Glickman Lauder Center of Excellence in Autism and Developmental Disorders and Waterboro Village Pediatrics, all of whom made this experience possible for my daughter, Sophia.

Sophia is an amazing 7-year-old. She’s smart, spunky, athletic and kind. She also has combined type ADHD and autism spectrum disorder. Sophia has attended about a dozen events at Merrill Auditorium since infancy but Cosmic Kotzschmar was the first one she was able to sit through in its entirety. Sitting still and staying quiet is hard for any child but particularly difficult for Sophia, even when the subject is one her favorites: outer space.

I can’t fully express how proud I am of Sophia. She got through to intermission and only started struggling a little in the second half. Still, she was aware of the need to stay quiet and whispered her needs as quietly as she could. One thing she’s worked hard on is communicating, with words, instead of going immediately to shrieks and yells. She was doing this successfully and well enough that audience members behind us and next to us commented on her good behavior.

Sophia’s attention span began to dwindle during the second half of Cosmic Kotzschmar, but my husband and I had planned out how to depart early if needed. However, while she was growing more fidgety and asking more questions, she was still behaving phenomenally. Had the many people who work with Sophia seen her that night, they would have been equally proud.

Given how well she was doing, I was taken aback when two audience members seated in front of us turned around to tell Sophia to quiet down. Now, I know how disruptive my daughter can be. It’s something my husband and I have experienced many times. We are incredibly aware of and very sensitive to it and have had to leave many occasions abruptly, or before they even started. But we were so far from that. I spent the remainder of the concert not present with the music but trying to understand how, at the same time I was so so proud of my daughter, others found her disruptive.

The thing is, as she matures, Sophia is growing much more aware of her behavior, and recognizing when she needs to regulate herself, but she needs your understanding when her behavior may not fit the “norm” and your patience as she regroups. October is ADHD Awareness Month. A recent article in the Lancet shows the prevalence of ADHD in children and adolescents (across six continents and 35 countries) at 5.29%.

We count ourselves lucky that Sophia has been able to access much-needed behavioral health care, especially in light of the Sept. 29 Maine Sunday Telegram cover story (“‘We’re suffering here’: Maine families of children with disabilities wait for help,”) about the Justice Department suing Maine. These kids (and many adults, for that matter) need to be seen. They need you to pause for just a moment before you judge; to take that pause to wonder if there’s a bigger picture.

My family will return to Friends of the Kotzschmar Organ’s upcoming event, Spooktacular Songs and Storytime. We will also go to Sea Dogs games, Maine state parks, grocery stores and everything in between. We never know how things will go, but we’ll keep trying. In addition to the professional support we receive, the support we receive from you and the community is just as life-changing.