Jay Glen Trachtenberg

TOMS RIVER, N.J. – Jay Glen Trachtenberg – “Jay” to some, “Poppy” to many – rode his antique wooden boat away from us on Sunday, Aug. 11, 2024.

He leaves behind his daughter, Lisa Goodkin, her spouse, Alan, and their children Julia and Jack; his son, Brian Trachtenberg, his spouse, Lillie Schechter, and their children Miles, Clara, and Ruby; and stepdaughters Elizabeth Saunders, her husband Neil, and their children Annie and Mickey; Dominique Palumbo Schenkel and her husband Jason; and Kathleen Palumbo Lohnes, her husband, Michael, and their children Ellie, Bridget, and Gavin; and his sister, Lorie Trachtenberg.

Jay grew up in West Orange, N.J., the son of Jerome, the managing editor of the New Jersey Law Journal for 40 years, and Edna, a devoted homemaker with a passion for investment management; and, 15 years later, the older brother to Lorie. In high school, he played tennis and was a member of the NJ Allstate Orchestra, playing violin. He earned his B.A. from Rutgers University in 1964, during which time he sang bass with the Rutgers University Glee Club, with which he toured the Netherlands and cut the album, “Songs Our Alma Mater Taught Us” (still available on eBay today!). He even cut a demo record with a doowop band and claimed in later years (to his family’s disbelief) that he’d have been a rockstar, if only Jerome had let him. Instead, he attended Rutgers University School of Law (JD, 1967), and the rest is (family) history.

Jay settled in Toms River, N.J. There, he enjoyed taking long bike rides with the now-deceased love of his life, Elizabeth “Liz” Gavin; ice skating at Winding River Ice Rink with his kids and stepkids; and going to the beach with his sister and close confidante, Lorie. And he always, always, enjoyed a good meal.

In 1970, he launched a solo law practice in New Egypt, N.J., where his mid-century modern building would become a fixture on Main Street. He originally practiced family, criminal, and personal injury law, but as his clients “grew up with him,” he turned his focus to small business and estate law. (If you asked him, he’d tell you he always practiced “rent law: whatever pays the rent!”) For a time, he maintained a second office in Toms River, N.J., and served as the prosecutor in Manchester, Lavalette and Barnegat, N.J. He enjoyed a lifelong love-hate relationship with the law, which he often referred to as his “jealous mistress.” He might have been happier doing something else, but then he wouldn’t have been him.

For the last 40 years of his life, he spent a good part of his summers, and even some of his falls, enjoying his log cabin, called “August Moon,” established on Pocasset Lake in Wayne, Maine in 1990. He loved taking his 1957 Lyman boat, named “Woody,” out on sunset cruises, telling stories of each house on the lake, as he slowly trolled the shoreline. He also enjoyed fishing, sitting on the dock, and – curiously – making the 40-minute drive to the dump (“it’s a very beautiful drive!”). In the evenings, he would read legal fiction and mysteries to the sounds of loons on the lake, inscribing the inside cover of each one he finished with a hand-scrawled review for the next person. And then he’d eat Tubby’s ice cream, maybe some pie, and fall asleep in his favorite chair.

Poppy leaves behind a tribe of happy, successful, caring people – the lucky few of his inner circle, whom he let into the scorching warmth of his giant, failing heart. We will fish, and boat, practice law, mentor, achieve, love, laugh, eat, and nap in his honor, with his blessing, and because of his enormous influence. As he would say at the end of each of the many texts he meticulously hammered out to his grandkids from his ancient flip phone in recent years, “Luv U Poppy.”

Donations can be made to the Maine Audubon Society at https://maineaudubon.org/, to Deborah Hospital Foundation at https://www.deborahfoundation.org/donate/, or the American Heart Association at https://www.heart.org.